The Frankenstein Theory (2013) Review

I wouldn’t exactly say that I’m the modern Horror genre’s biggest fan but every so often I find myself scrolling through Netflix or NowTV’s selection to see if anything piques my interest. On my latest trip I came across The Frankenstein Theory and at first glance it ticked some of the boxes for me. I mentioned in my review of The Visit that I like the found footage genre but I also like a good monster movie and this touted both in the description. It also said on the poster it showed on NowTV that it was from the creators of The Last Exorcism which is actually one of my favourite horror movies of all time. However since watching it I’ve looked up both these movies and I can’t find any crossover members of the directing, producing, music or writing teams on the Wikipedia pages so I don’t know where that claim came from.

 

This review will contain full spoilers

 

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Thinking About Neck Bolts

Our story opens up in the office of Professor Jonathan Venkenheim who has hired a documentary crew lead by our main character Vicky for a secret adventure. The audience and the film crew both get the big reveal at the same time, Venkenheim is in search of a Frankenstein monster! He believes that Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein was actually a loose retelling of actual events and that his ancestor is the real Dr. Frankenstein. Unfortunately all the evidence of this was burned in a lab fire but he still holds out hope that the monster is still alive. Understandably the crew don’t believe a word of this but he’s paying good money so they go along with it. I really liked the comradery between the film crew, they are the grounded characters that act as the audience surrogate and mostly remark on how stupid and hopeless their situations are.

 

So apparently ol’ Frank is somewhere in the wilds of Canada at the moment so they pack up and set out on the road. Their first stop is with an eye witness they want to interview but it turns out this witness is a little bit of a meth head who holds them up at gunpoint when they mention he may have met Dr. F’s monster. So as you can expect from a horror movie it all goes downhill from here. Next they meet up with their guide Karl who can take them further into the wilderness, he’s your classic salty old hard-ass. They play him off to be a bit creepy at first as he tells them that out there you either listen to his orders or face an icy death. I really enjoyed this character though, his inclusion alleviates some of the tension once the gang gets to know him a bit over some drinks while they’re huddled in a yurt.

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Fright Night

Once nightfall comes is where things start to get a bit more weird. At first they all hear the baying of wolves which is unsettling but then they hear an almighty roar and some thrashing that freaks everyone out and silences the wolves. Come morning they find that their snowmobile is trashed leaving them a stranded. They also find some comically big footprints which Karl decides to follow so he can teach whoever did it a lesson. This starts off that good old horror movie cliche of everyone being picked off one by one. This is where the film lost me, you don’t see nearly enough of the monster and he seems to be able to appear out of nowhere considering he’s so huge. You’d also think he’d be more noticeable seeing as they’re surrounded by untouched white snow so anything approaching should stick out like a big green sore thumb.

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So even after all of this murdering Prof. Venkenheim still thinks he can reason with Big F using their shared family ties but he seems reluctant to go out there and put this to the test. He is eventually forced to once Frankie has Vicky and him trapped in the yurt. At this point we’re watching through a locked camera pointed at the door. We see him walk out then hear him try to reason with him and at first it seems to be working but then we hear what sounds like Venkenheim getting snapped in half.

 

I'm sad now

 

So it’s not until the very last scene that we get a decent look at the monster and he just looks like the giants from Game of Thrones but a bit more zombie like I guess. He comes into the room, bashes Vicky on the head and carries her off. We get to watch him stroll away into the distance through the open door as the credits roll and that’s it! I felt like this movie ended just as it was getting going. They could have at least let us see what life was like for Francesco and his new lady friend through handheld camera footage or something. It was seriously the most jarring and unsatisfying ending I’ve experienced in a long time. I would have really liked to see more hunting of the monster, he just shows up the first night they set up camp without any mystery at all. The main reason I watched this was because of the (now tenuous) links to The Last Exorcism but this was nowhere near as good so I would just recommend you watch that instead.

 

★★☆☆☆

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No Man’s Sky – Review PS4

If you’ve tried to follow any of the news about this game over the 3 years since it was announced you’re probably pretty confused as to what this game is. The release of No Man’s Sky has been irreversibly marred by controversy due to one of the creators Shaun Murray being a bit vague about whether or not there is multiplayer. People have been unfairly slamming the game with low user review scores, trying to claim refunds on grounds of false advertising and most disturbingly sending death threats to the development team. I can say up front with 100% certainty that there is no multiplayer at all in No Man’s Sky and honestly I don’t think that would have made people happy anyway.

 

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So what is this game? At its most basic level NMS is a survival game, you explore an environment looking for resources to repair your ship, power your suit and upgrade your items. There have been plenty of similar games like this (e.g. Minecraft, Don’t Starve, The Long Dark) released on PC but NMS’s gimmick that set’s it apart is its huge universe that you can freely explore.

 

Lost in Space

 

You start the game by taking control of a faceless spaceman/woman/robot who wakes up next to a crashed ship on a random planet. This serves as the game’s tutorial mission, you need to repair your ship so you can leave the planet. The interesting thing about this task is that the planet is random so you can have a pretty different experience to another person. I started out on a horrible lifeless planet with acid rain that was constantly ticking away at my suit’s life support. You have to collect various elements like iron and plutonium by mining rocks and crystals then combine them into the missing ship parts. This can take a couple of hours depending on how lucky you get with resources in the area, it becomes a sort of balancing act though because some of these same resources are also used to recharge your life support. The start of this game is very confusing, it doesn’t really make a good first impression. I think it leaves you to figure out way too much on your own which just frustrated me especially because I had to keep running back to my ship to avoid the acid rain.

 

Once you fix your ship you’re finally free to start exploring SPAAAACE! I got the hell off my planet first second I could, once you get past the atmosphere you should start to see some planets around the current start system you’re in. You can fly to any of these planets which is a video game dream people have had for years. Your overall goal is to journey to the center of the universe but other than that you’re just supposed to explore the endless planets.

 

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Throughout the marketing cycle they have been boasting that the game contains over 18 quintillion planets which is an almost unfathomable number if you’re not an astrophysicist. Most people playing the game will probably only see around 50-100 before they’re done so the game never really feels that big while you’re playing. I am in no way discounting the amazing technological achievement this game is however, the developer Hello Games have done some amazing things here. In the way Minecraft can randomly generate a landmass for you to play on NMS’s universe has been built in a similar way. Hello Games figured out a formula that creates planets all with random weather, animals, plants, alien buildings and oceans which is how such a small team has created something this huge. Once this had all been generated it was locked in place so everyone playing the game right now is in the same starting universe.

 

Fear of a Meme Planet

 

One of the only interactions you can have with other players is naming things you discover. If you’re the first person to discover something whether it be a star system, planet, creature, plant or rock you will have the opportunity to name it yourself. If by chance someone else were to land on your planet they would be see what you had named it. In my hours of playtime I didn’t come across anything other people had discovered, it seems as these kinds of interactions are extremely rare. How disappointing that barely anyone will get to explore the majesty of my planet Harambe IV in the Dark Naruto 420 star system but I guess that will make it a really special moment if you do find some evidence of another player.

 

On paper this really does sound like one of the greatest games of all time but unfortunately it’s just not that much fun. I ended up getting stuck in a rut just doing the same things over and over again. I would enter a star system, land on the nearest planet, look for a inventory upgrade, sell all my extra items then do it all again. There are definitely others things I could have been doing but none of it felt worth it.

 

NMS dog thing

 

They give you a very vague path to follow which I guess you could call a story but unfortunately it all amounts to nothing. After a while I found myself skipping planets which is not something I wanted to do but they don’t give you enough incentive to explore. A lot of the planets have the same buildings and alien ruins on them and there are no quests or missions to found on the planets. If you meet another alien they usually just give you a random item recipe or teach you a bit of their language so you can eventually understand what they’re saying. The aliens have actually been my favourite part of the game. They found a way to make them really charming even though for most of the game you can’t understand what they’re saying to you.

 

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This game works much better as a passive activity, if you’ve got some music or a podcast to listen to while you play you’ll probably see less of NMS’s downsides. This game was just a bit of a disappointment for me. I didn’t have any ridiculous expectations like some other people on the internet but I did expect it to be more of a rewarding experience. I’ll definitely come back to it from time to time because it can be a beautiful game and it is a pretty amazing technical feat.

 
★★★☆☆

G.L.O.S.S. – Trans Day of Revenge Review

G.L.O.S.S. aka Girls Living Outside Society’s Shit, are a hardcore punk band from Olympia, Washington (State). They specialise in writing songs in support of the LGBTQ+ community with their own very personal brand of unflinching musical protest.

 

Trans Day of Revenge is a follow up to their incredible 2015 debut demo and this release is equally incredible in it’s own right. It’s an album calling for an end to the pacifism people have regarding violence against the LGBTQ+ community and People of Colour. The singer Sadie’s lyrics burn with rage and a cynicism that you rarely hear when people talk about these topics in mainstream media.

 

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While the lyrics are poignant and modern, their actual musical style is kind of a throwback. It reminds me of Minor Threat and other American Hardcore bands of that era. G.L.O.S.S. skate the musical line between control and a frenzy so well. Every song will immediately get you fired up and you can almost feel the band’s passion flowing through you.

 

The first song “Give Violence a Chance” starts out with Sadie screaming out a battle cry “When peace is just another word for death/It’s our turn to give violence a chance.”. This song deals with the many deaths of black people there have been at the hands of the law. The release of this album on June 13th 2016 also tragically coincided with Orlando Pulse shooting giving this song extra impact and importance. It’s a great opener to the album and sets a hard and fast pace that the rest of the songs follow.

 

The song “Fight” is a powerful call to arms encouraging trans people to fight for their lives. The song starts off with an awesome scream and runs from there, never stopping for anything. The lyrics “Don’t give them a chance/Sleep with a hammer/Fill a clip with nine rounds/Plus one in the chamber/When the front door comes down” are really effective at conveying the struggle trans people are forced to deal with. At the time of writing the last 3 reported murders of trans people of colour were all in their own homes. It’s an uncomfortable message to hear but it’s something that needs to be heard.

 

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Their singer Sadie is a trans woman herself and the song “We Live” is an introspective chronicle of her own experiences growing up trans and finding solace in the punk scene. It’s also an inspirational song for anyone else going through similar issues with the lyrics like “We live and die/Against the grain/For ourselves we live” encouraging solidarity.

 

The final song “Trans Day of Revenge” is my favourite track of the album. This song opens with an awesome groovy riff. It just makes me want to dive into the mosh pit immediately. The punching chorus repeats the title of the song and every time I hear it I want to shout along with them. The song ends on a perfect line to sum up this whole album “Not as weak as we seem”.

 

 

I believe that this will go down as one of the most important punk albums of all time. If I achieve anything by writing this it’s that a few more people will know about this band. They’re a band for all the outcasts, a voice for the voiceless.

 

This release may only be 5 tracks and clocks in at 6 minutes and 58 seconds but that in no way diminishes any of it’s impact. I’ve just been playing it on a loop, I just can’t get enough. Right now it’s only available on their Bandcamp page for pay-what-you-want.

 

We need bands like this to exist in the world. Trans Day of Revenge feels like closest my generation will have to a Sex Pistols moment, an album and band that deserve to set the world on fire. It’s a really exciting start to what’s hopefully a long music career. Wherever G.L.O.S.S. go in the future they have my full support. Get used to it or get out of their way.

 

★★★★★

Gojira – Magma Review

In a departure from their usual style, Gojira’s 6th studio release ‘Magma’ is a very personal album dealing with concepts of grief and despair over the loss of a loved one. During the recording of this album vocalist and guitarist Joe Duplantier and drummer Mario Duplantier lost their mother and this had a profound effect on the mood and theme of the songs.

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Not only is the tone of their songs quite different from the previous work their sound has also changed quite a bit. Everything sounds stripped down, the guitars aren’t as harsh, the bass has a distorted muddy sound, the drum compositions are simpler and there are more instances of clean vocals. If you’re already a metal fan this may sound a bit off putting but all of the changes together really help with the concept of the album. The quality of the songs in no way suffer from the simpler instrumentation. No track feels out of place on the album and they all sound like they’ve had a lot of thought put into them.

 

The opening tracks of the album ‘Shooting Star’ and ‘Silvera’ really set the tone up front with heavy droning guitar riffs. The way the songs meander creates an otherworldly dreamlike feeling that really helps you get into the band’s head space. The main riff in ‘The Cell’ demonstrates this perfectly, the punching guitar and bass build an impressively oppressive sense of dread throughout the track.

 

The standout song for me is ‘Stranded’. The vocal performance during the chorus is amazing. You can really feel the emotion and the pain, Joe sounds like he’s singing for his life. Pouring every bit of his passion into it, especially when they change the key the last time around.

 

 

Some of Gojira’s more classic sound does come back for the later songs ‘Pray’ and ‘Only Pain’. Mario’s trademark double bass pedal drumming is back in full force here. It feels as if this is the band finding themselves a little amongst all the darkness as the album progresses. The lyrics in the song ‘Low Lands’ reads like a message to their mother and it’s heartbreaking. There’s a hopeful theme to this song and it has a strong ending riff that feels like the band is waking from a dream state, ready to tackle the future.

I will admit that it took me a few listens to really get into this album. It is a bit of a change in style from their previous albums which was a shock at first but it’s actually became one of my favourite metal albums of all time. You can tell it’s a deeply personal work of art right from the start, Gojira have expertly translated all the pain and emotion of grief into some of the greatest music of 2016.

 

★★★★★

Stardew Valley – PC Review

I don’t have that much of a history with farming games. I’ve tried the odd Harvest Moon game over the years and I am a fan of the Animal Crossing series but there’s never really been a farming game that held my interest for very long. Perhaps the living through the dark days of Farmville on Facebook soured me on the whole concept.

 

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But Stardew Valley is nowhere near as insidious as a crappy Zynga Facebook game, it’s actually one of the most pleasant gaming experiences I’ve had in recent memory.

 

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In Stardew Valley your character starts out working a soul crushing office job for the evil Joja Mega Corporation. Just as your character is at their lowest they remember a letter they received from their grandfather informing you that you’ve inherited the family farm in the picturesque town of Stardew Valley. So you quit your office job and move out in the country to start your new life. You arrive late at night and only have time to chat to the mayor before you turn in. Once you wake up on the first day of spring this is where the game really begins.

 

The first thing you’ll notice is that the farm is a little bit of a dump. The ground is covered in rocks, grass, trees and fallen logs and you’ll have to clear a path so you can actually plant anything there. Luckily you start off with a full set of tools you’ll need which was the first pleasant surprise because usually you have to scrounge around for your tools in Animal Crossing and that’s always the most frustrating part. Every time you crack a rock or chop a tree down you also get resources like stone you can use for building, hay you can feed to your animals or tree sap you can craft into fertiliser.

 

This makes even the most mundane tasks fun because there’s an extremely satisfying pop sound every time you pick something up, it just feels so good. Speaking of sound the music in this game is great, every season has a slightly different theme but they’re all relaxing and very easy to get stuck in your head. One of the spring songs is so catchy I miss it when it changes to summer but it just gives me something to look forward to when spring comes back.

 

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Daily Grind

 

Once you get into a bit of routine most of your days will consist of getting up and watering/harvesting your crops then selling them so you can expand your farming operations. There isn’t really a set goal in the game, you’re pretty much free to make money however you want. You get some quests that will slowly introduce you to some of the different mechanics like building a coop for chickens or encouraging you to explore the landscape.

 

One of the things you’ll want to explore is an abandoned mine on the outside of the town. This is where you can get ores which you’ll need to upgrade your tools and to build some of the more complicated farm buildings and machines. You can find precious stones here too that you can donate to the museum for rewards or sell for some extra cash. This is also where the game becomes more of an rpg. There are monsters down there which you’ll need to take out before you can mine in peace and you can also equip your character with armor and better swords to make it easier. The deeper you go down in the mine the better the potential rewards can be so any items that speed up your spelunking adventures really help.

 

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Time Enough at Last

 

Almost every action you take in the game slowly drains your stamina meter, this means you won’t always be able to do everything you need to do in one day. Your character also can’t stay up past 2 am which I found out the hard way while exploring the mine. If you exhaust this meter or stay up too late all that happens is you wake up in the doctor’s office but they do charge you about 500 gold which at the start can be a bit steep.

 

You can easily use half of your energy just watering your plants in the morning so you really have to plan before you head off into the mines. You can take food with you to top yourself up but you don’t want to be eating too many crops either. Sometimes it can be a lot to think about but there aren’t really any strict time limits, you can keep playing forever because the year just loops.

 

One thing you do have to watch out for is the seasons because you’re spring crops will instantly fail if you haven’t harvested them when summer comes along. I got caught out by this on my first summer but it’s the kind of thing you’ll only mess up once. The game has a bit of a harsh learning curve at times, I do think they could have included some more tutorials as there can be a lot of trial and error when you first start out. There have been a few times when I’ve had to consult the Wikia just to figure out the basic game mechanics which I don’t particularly mind but it might put new gamers off.

 

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Rancho Relaxo

 

The main thing that keeps me coming back to Stardew Valley is that it’s one of the most relaxing games I’ve ever played. Granted there can be a sense of urgency when you’re delving deep into the mines and it get’s a bit late but even then there isn’t much of a penalty if you mess anything up. The game lets you do everything on your own time which is great if you haven’t got the chance to play for hours on end. It also borders on addictive at times, I always find myself wanting to just do one more day which can often turn into about 20 more.

 

On it’s surface Stardew Valley seems like a simple game but there’s immense depth to be uncovered if you’re willing. It’s all the more impressive when you learn that this game was all made by 1 person (Developer Eric Barone). I really can’t recommend this game enough, its PC specs are so low almost any PC can run it and at the time of writing it was £10.99 on Steam so it’s definitely value for money.

 

★★★★★

The Visit (2015) Review

I love the found footage genre of horror films. In the days where we are constantly filming everything it gives these movies an unsettling and familiar visual style. But when done badly they can be utterly confusing barf fests that just leave people annoyed at the end of it. Luckily star director M. Night Shyamalan and the producers of Paranormal Activity have made something better than your standard Blair Witch knock off.

 

This review will contain some mild spoilers about plot moments

 

the visit poster

We start the movie being introduced to our main characters, the brother and sister team Becca and Tyler who will be our camera operators for most of the movie. One thing that struck me straight away was that these characters are impossibly quirky for real people. They do have some believable personal moments throughout but a lot of their dialogue just doesn’t seem right for their age. The basic premise is that they are going to stay with their grandparents for a week that they’ve never met before because their mother left home on very bad terms with them.

 

Becca is an aspiring filmmaker and wants to make a documentary so she can finally get the real story on why the family is estranged. She also hopes she can get some closure for her mother and maybe mend some bridges along the way. We get some fun moments during their train journey but we also get the first instance of the movie’s most cringey recurring joke, Tyler’s amateur rapping. I’m all for moments of comedy in horror films, it can provide much needed levity when things get tough to watch but this white kid’s rapping sucks. M. Night clearly thought this was hilarious for some reason because it’s revisited about 4 times.

 

So anyway the kids are greeted at the train station by their grandparents, referred to as Nana and Pop Pop for the rest of the movie. There is a general air of uneasiness at first but the kids put it down to everyone meeting each other for the first time. The kids bake cookies with Nana, get a tour of the house with Pop Pop and eventually settle in for the night. This is when Pop Pop tells the kids the one house rule “Bedtime here is 9:30. It’s probably best if you two shouldn’t come out of your room after that. See you in the morning”.

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What a Horrible Night to Have a Curse

About an hour later Becca decides she can probably sneak down to get some more cookies without disturbing anyone so sets out with her camera. As she starts going downstairs Nana walks into frame and starts projectile vomiting, understandably Becca freaks out and gets the hell out of there. Next morning she speaks to Pop Pop about it who explains is away as a 24 hour stomach bug. This is pretty much the format of the movie, it’s a lot like Paranormal Activity in that way. Each new day there’s a title card so you know how many days the kids have left to endure and most of the scary stuff happens at night. I like this day/night format because I can get all anxious and excited for what crazy stuff is going to happen that night, then you are relieved when you see it’s daytime again.

 

As you can imagine things escalate every night. Nana is extremely creepy, she runs around the house at night naked scratching at the walls and banging doors. I think at first you’re supposed to think she’s possessed but again Pop Pop explains this away as sundowning, which is a form of heightened dementia that sets in once the sun goes down. Deanna Dunagan who plays Nana is really impressive, the way she crawls around and growls with her hair over her face is horrifying and she’s scarily nimble for a 76 year old. It’s the kind of character that you don’t even want to look at but you can’t tear your eyes away because you want to know she’s going to do next.

Nana

What a Twist!

Knowing that this is an M. Night Shyamalan horror movie most people will be on the lookout for a plot twist. Disappointingly I did guess part of the twist while I was watching but it didn’t invalidate the rest of the movie for me, I still wanted to see how it all turned out.

 

This felt like a pretty personal project for M. Night, it has a really small cast of characters and I felt like Becca represented the young filmmaker in him. It also a much smaller movie than he’d been making recently and it has an incredible short cast list. I liked this aspect of it because you got to spend a lot of time with the important people and it gave him more time to linger on interpersonal moments when the movie needed it.

 

This movie really preyed on my fears of old people, it had some genuinely scary and unsettling moments. There were also some fairly disturbing moments involving an adult diaper which I’d like to forget. In contrast to the horror it also had some pretty effective moments of heart and introspection from the kids which work surprisingly well. I liked The Visit way more that I thought I would and while parts of it may have been formulaic I came away satisfied with the ending… until they had Tyler rap again over the credits!

★★★★☆

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Tyler’s Rapping: ☆☆☆☆☆

 

Independence Day: Resurgence Review

I’m going to confess that I’m not really a fan of the first Independence Day movie. It definitely has it’s moments, I like the suspense they create before the aliens attack but as soon as everything starts blowing up I lose interest. Going into this movie I had really low expectations, I’d been hearing early review buzz and all signs were pointing to this being one of the worst movies of the summer. As it turns out going in with low expectations is probably the best way to experience Independence Day: Resurgence.

 

This review will contain story spoilers.

 

ID4 logo

 

Welcome to Earth

 

As the film opens we’re treated to a quick fly over of Washington DC so we can see how advanced civilization has came since the first movie. The people of 1996 who defeated the aliens in the last movie took their technology and used it to advance our own even going so far as to copy their landmark destroying weapons. As we pan over all the future things they replay Bill Pullman’s iconic Independence Day speech. We also learn that one of the ships that landed in 1996 has transmitted the recording of Pullman to all their buddies and now they’re really pissed off!

 

We follow a character into the white house with the camera behind him, he stops just outside the oval office to take in a gold framed painting on the wall. A painting of Steven Hiller AKA Will Smith who’s been killed between movies because he wouldn’t reprise his role. I burst out laughing at this because it just looks so goofy. They were clearly thought this would be a cool moment but it looks like a promotional image from the first movie.

 

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Just imagine a big fancy frame around this photo and you’re basically there.

 

It also turns out that this young man we’ve been following is Hiller’s son Dylan, who’s followed in his father’s footsteps and became an ace fighter pilot. They are trying to introduce some new blood into the franchise but the problem is that they don’t get rid of any of the old guys. They bring back pretty much everyone you care about: Ex-President Pullman is back with a beard this time, Jeff Goldblum is probably the closest you get to a main character here, the two weird scientists get to rekindle their relationship and Judd Hirsch even shows up to be a ridiculous cartoon character of a man.

 

Quietly out of the Night

 

This movie goes at breakneck speed throughout. There’s absolutely no suspense when the aliens show up after what feels like 15 mins. They just appear literally out of nowhere in a huge ship and make quick work of Earth’s puny defenses stationed on the moon. They say the ship is about 3000 miles long, so big that it has it’s own gravity. All the aliens need to do is fly over London and within seconds it’s completely destroyed under chunks of our own British hubris *drops monocle*.

 

To be honest though all the destruction and action scenes throughout were a bit lackluster in my opinion. These scenes would have been cool in 1997 but after all the crazy Michael Bay and Zack Snyder madness we’ve had since then you need to do more to impress jaded action movie fans.

 

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Gooey Center

 

So after landing their ship over the entire Northern Atlantic Ocean their uninspired plan is to drill a mile wide hole all the way down to the Earth’s core and extract all of our delicious liquid hot magma. Just like Dr. Evil’s plan in the first Austin Powers movie except our evil aliens aren’t concerned with getting 1 million dollars, just revenge.

 

One thing I was hoping for in this movie was a little bit more of the alien’s backstory but they didn’t deliver. You’ll notice I’m referring to them as the aliens a lot, that’s because they don’t even give us any other name for them. All they tell us is that they steal other planet’s resources to power their ships and that each mother ship has a (stop me if you’ve heard this one before) queen alien that controls all of the drone warriors. I don’t know if it’s just me but I need some back story for my villains so I can get invested in their plan.

 

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The Saga Begins

 

While the aliens are setting up their mining operation the humans uncover a mysterious orb that happens to be part of an advanced civilization that has been battling the jerk aliens for years now. So this is the moment that the franchise hooks really embed themselves. The scientists learn from the orb that there is a galactic refugee planet which is the only place safe from the jerk aliens (see, this is why they need a real name!) and this orb was coming to invite Earth to be a part of it so we could avoid destruction.

 

This was the only part of the movie that really interested me, Humans joining up with a bunch of weird good aliens to fight evil aliens sounds like a much better movie idea. However this revelation did devalue the movie for me because from then on all I could think about how I’d rather be watching the sequel. They out their own movie as simply a stepping stone about an hour before the end. This made the final battle feel really flat because we already knew that this alien queen is only the start of Earth’s battle.

 

So yeah, as you can imagine they blow up the queen seconds before the laser reaches the Earth’s core and the world is saved!…Except there’s now a mile wide hole in the middle of the Northern Atlantic Ocean that goes down most of the way to the core. Now I’m no scientist but I think that would cause a few problems for our little blue planet.

 

Movie: “Screw your pesky science, it’s Independence Day!”

 

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I could only recommend this movie as a rental, there’s just not enough substance here to warrant full ticket price. There is some fun to be had if you turn your brain off and just let the stupid one liners and explosions wash over you but it loses it’s charm if you start to think too deeply about it.

 

★★☆☆☆